Joke of the Week

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints/problems, generally known as 'squawks', recently submitted by pilots to maintenance engineers. After attending to the squawks, maintenance crews are required to log the details of the action taken to solve them.

P - Something loose in cockpit. S - Something tightened in cockpit.
P - Dead bugs on windshield. S - Live bugs on backorder.
P - Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent. S - Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P - Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. S - Evidence removed.
P - DME volume unbelievably loud. S - Volume set to more believable level.
P - Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. S - That's what they are there for!
P - IFF inoperative. S - IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P - Suspected crack in windscreen. S - Suspect you're right.
P - Number 3 engine missing. S - Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P - Aircraft handles funny. S - Aircraft warned to "Straighten up, Fly Right, and Be Serious."
P - Target radar hums. S - Reprogrammed target radar with words.
P - Mouse in cockpit. S - Cat installed.

Joke of the Week

FIRST SPANKING


Once there was a little boy who never got into trouble. But one day, he broke a window, so his dad said, "Go upstairs and think about what you've done and I'll be up to give a spanking.
So this little boy is sitting upstairs, scared because he's never gotten a spanking and doesn't know what it's like. About 20 minutes later, his dad comes up,spanks him, then goes back downstairs.

The little boy is just sitting there, crying. Suddenly he stops, pulls his pants down, and backs up to the mirror. He gasps in shock, then pulls his pants back up.
He runs downstairs to his dad and says, "Are you satisfied now, daddy? You cracked it!"